lonely soul [random thoughts]

“Now my heart’s in two and I can’t find the other half...”

Sad. That I am.

How long have I been this way? I’m not sure.

Yes, I was always a loner. Every step of the way. Then I met him. It was the most perfect experience of my life. Utter, complete bliss. Am I saying that just because that’s what I want to believe deep down?

Jared, I don’t know. I’m trying to erase it all, even from deep down. Trying to expunge. Believe me, I am trying.

Rage, I’ve been so lonely since then, you cannot begin to fathom.

Jon, thank you, for everything.

Andrew, forgive me. I truly am sorry.

Chris, .......................

If ever there’s anyone who could even begin to understand what I’m feeling, I haven’t met them yet. If ever there’s a way to fix this, I haven’t seen it yet.

Dreaming. Always dreaming.

Living. Always in this unreal little world of mine.

I’ve been a lover of solitude.

Yet now... I just don’t know. There’s an emptiness in me that aches as though it’s embedded so very deep, I cannot even reach down to try and heal the wounds myself.

Wondering why the pen in my hand flies over these pages, inking these words when they can be nought but meaningless...

Can I live this life alone?

Can I keep moving forward alone?

Can I find success and happiness alone?

*laughs*

Of course. As though I had another choice.

I’ve always been alone. So why can I not, ae?

“It’s like I’m walking on broken glass...”

Signed;

~ The Loner ~